In the theme of New Years resolutions and goals, I will tell you all a little success story of mine.
Since quitting my real person job and moving back in with my parents, I thought I could use my sudden abundance of time to start taking better care of my body. For those of you unaqquainted with my habits, you should know that this is quite a feat, as my diet has typically been made up of a large amount of the Combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell dollar menu, and that I only went to the gym in college to play intermural basketball or to climb on the rock wall. And that only happened, like, 4 times.
So despite years of bad habits working against me, I decided I was going to lose those lbs I’d packed on since I’d left for college. In my attempt to reach this goal, I realized I needed to make some changes. I got a dog, in hopes that I would walk it (I don’t). I spent hours deciding which gym to join (I haven’t). But despite these setbacks, I have manage to actually lose some weight. And I didn’t even notice! Until today…
Today, the 68 year old dishwasher at the restaurant where I am employed walked up to me, and began, as he always does, to speak to me, rapidly, in Spanish. This would be fine, if I understood a word of Spanish. I do not.
Our conversation went something like this:
Grandpa (Also for some creepy reason, everyone calls this man “Grandpa”): Thrajdke ajsowe dsalkjfa fasjdflkj asdjfasf SPANISH SPANISH SPANISH kjfa asdfjslfkj dfas jsfd al”
Me: “Grandpa, you know I don’t speak Spanish, I can’t understand you. I took French remember? Lo ciento!? No comprendo?! YO NO SAY?!”
Grandpa then starts gesturing with his arms while still rambling in Spanish. He points at me (mostly my mid-region), then holds his hands apart real wide, then brings them in, then points to me. This happens repeatedly, while I, in a bizarro game of charades, try to guess what exactly he’s trying to say about me to me.
Eventually we reach this:
Me: “What Grandpa? Are you saying that I was fat? But now I’m not?”
Grandpa: “Si, si!” (Nods and smiles and continues to gesture and point)
Me: “Ok. Thanks.”
Thanks to Grandpa, today I realized that I’d reached a goal without even trying! I think that’s a good lesson to take away. Sometimes, it’s just better to not even try.
PS. I’m pretty sure the secret to my disappearing figure is that I drink a lot of Five Hour Energies, then lose my appetite for days! Or maybe it’s just the new pants I got. In any case, Grandpa thinks I’m skinny. And that’s all that really matters, right?